Mmmmmm......look at all that chocolate.....I LOVE chocolate. I would eat chocolate for breakfast, lunch, dinner, AND dessert if I could. I joined a group called Tuesdays with Dorie and we are supposed to bake something and post it every Tuesday from the cookbook by Dorie Greenspan called, Baking: From My Home to Yours.
This is my first entry: chocolate chunkers. They have unsweetened cocoa powder, unsweetened chocolate, bittersweet chocolate, dark chocolate, and white chocolate in them. YUM!
I wanted to use some good quality chocolate chunks so I went to Whole Foods, they have a wide variety of chocolate from all over the world! As I was chopping up the chocolate it was so hard to resist just eating it right then and their. I snuck a couple of tiny pieces and popped them into my mouth. Mmmmm....bittersweet chocolate. It wasn't sweet so the power of the chocolate taste really took over as it slowly melted my mouth. No more! I told myself, wait until the cookies are done!
I melted the unsweetened and bittersweet chocolate with some butter and mixed it together with the cocoa powder and flour to create this luscious, silky dough. It was smoother, creamier than any cookie dough I have ever worked with. How is this going to be thick and solid enough to form little dough balls that will melt into ooey-gooey cookies in the oven? Maybe I screwed the recipe up? Maybe I should just eat up this dough and start over? I checked and double checked the recipe. Nope, I did it right. I forced myself to keep going and not drink this luscious chocolate silk straight from the bowl.
More chopping of luscious sweet chocolate. More temptations I had to resist. More sneaking of sweet tiny little chocolate morsels melting in my mouth. Mmmm.....the silky smooth sweet texture of white chocolate, and the sharp yet surprisingly sweet texture of the dark chocolate. I did not melt this chocolate. I mixed right into the dough. When baked, it will create creamy, melty pockets of gooey chocolate in the cookies. Yum, just thinking about it makes my mouth water.
I was not too sure about the last two ingredients I had to add too my scrumptiously chocolaty mixture. Dried fruit and nuts? But what if it takes away from my chocolate? I was skeptical about how nuts and dried fruit could be good in these cookies. But I added them anyway. I decided to use almonds and tried tropical fruit bits because that is what I had around the house.
As I placed the big, chunky droplets of dough onto the parchment paper I began to get excited. These are going to be yummy! I threw them in the oven before I could start eating the raw dough right off of the cookie sheet and then washed the bowl (after licking it clean of course!).
I only baked them for ten minutes, the minimum amount of time the recipe says because I wanted them to be really gooey! They came out of the oven looking so amazingly good! The outside coat was dry and a little crackly with tons of gooey pockets of melty, melty chocolate.
The inside was absolutely soft and moist. I impatiently waited for them to cool. Wishing I could just gobble them up right as they came out of the oven. After ten minutes I couldn't wait any longer. I placed two cookies in front of me with a glass of milk. Mmmm....they were a gooey and soft as they looked. And wow were they chocolaty! A little overpoweringly so. There was a bit too much bitter and not quite enough sweet. The nuts and fruit were surprisingly good in the cookie, however, they gave it texture and crunch. I savored each bite, absolutely melting with love every time I bit into one of the gooey white chocolate pockets. Two cookies was all I could eat, the chocolate was too overpowering for my taste buds! I had no idea that could be possible! The chocolate in these cookies are so intense, you really can't eat too many!
I sent the rest with my husband to work. They got a great response, everyone loved them and they were gone in a day! Thank you Claudia of Fool for Food for choosing this recipe!
It was an unusually warm and pleasant evening in San Francisco. Earlier in the day I mentioned to Eddie that we should spend some time outside. We should take the dog on an extended walk, or walk down to our old apartment complex and say hi to some friends, or walk to Taylor's Automatic Refresher and get some milkshakes... why did I mention that last one? I knew that would be what Eddie would want to do. Secretly, that is what I really wanted to do as well, but I didn't want to let myself. Milkshakes are bad for you I keep telling myself. Milkshakes make you fat! But I couldn't change my mind now, I couldn't back down...and deep down inside I didn't really want to.
When the evening finally came around, I made sure not to stuff myself too much with dinner....just in case we did decide to get milkshakes later. I kept thinking maybe Eddie would forget, but I couldn't get it out of my mind. What if Eddie did forget? Then I wouldn't get my milkshake! But that's a good thing, right? Then why am I so afraid of it? I keep trying to convince myself that I really don't want the milkshake, that it will make me fat, it will make me feel bad. But the more I think about it, the more I want it. I casually mention to Eddie that I want to be outside...it is too nice to be stuck inside. "Okay," he casually says, "let's go get milkshakes."
During the walk there I try not to think about it. We make small talk, we talk about my blog and how I am going to make money off of it...someday. :) How we want to have a family someday and I want to be able to devote my time to my family and not have to split time with my family and a full time job. It works, I don't think about that milkshake until we get to Taylor's. I find a booth outside and wait with the dog while Eddie orders us each a shake.
This is when I get antsy....where is he? Why is he taking so long? Does it really take this long to make a milkshake? Then I start planning out exactly how I am going to drink/eat it. I'm going to use a spoon and take little spoonfuls at a time. No, I'm going to use a straw. I'm going to only eat half. No, I'm going to eat the whole thing. No, I'm just going to see how I feel. This is usually what happens when I'm eating something "bad" or "fattening" or whatever you want to call it.
Finally, after what seems like a century...Eddie comes outside with our shakes. I got mint chip. Eddie had this shake last time and it looked so yummy. The best part was after you drank all the shake your left with a pile of yummy chocolate chips that just melt in your mouth. I was so looking forward to that part. The only problem was... that meant I would have to drink the entire shake. Just drink it slow...see how you feel.
Mmmmm.....minty, cold, smooth, creamy milkshake. It was so thick, and so so so good. I slowly sipped it and thoroughly enjoyed each mouthful. At the halfway point I stopped. I don't need anymore. I'm getting a bit full. I don't even really want any more. But those chocolate chips! Oh I want those chocolate chips. Maybe I'll save the rest. yes, that is what I will do. I will save the rest. I will put it in the freezer and keep it for tomorrow. But I don't want to eat this again. I don't want to see it again. Out of sight, out of mind. But I can't throw it away. And waste those yummy chocolate chips? No no no. But what shall I do? This is a real dilemma.
This is about when I stopped myself, took a deep breath and told myself to shut up because I was being ridiculous. I decided to let myself drink it all. Acknowledge that the healthy thing to do would be to save the other half for another day then give myself a break! I don't have to be healthy 100% of the time. I don't eat milkshakes every day! I eat healthy 90% of the time. It's ok to indulge once in awhile!
So that is what I did. I drank the whole thing. Every last sip until all that was left was a pile of yummy smooth little chocolate square. I used a spoon to eat those. I let each mouthful slowly melt in my mouth. It was heaven.
When I was done I felt full. I felt bloated, and a little bit guilty... okay A LOT guilty. But it was worth it, I think. I got to spend some time in the beautiful weather outdoors with my husband and my dog. I let myself eat something that I normally don't and I decided instead of beating myself up about it I would enjoy it and release all the guilt onto my blog. So here I am saying goodbye, because I know that in the morning I will feel normal again and all remnants of that shake, the "fat" feeling, the bloating, the fullness, will be all gone.
